I am 21 years old and I'm recovering from being burnt out and dealing with a quarter life crisis.
During my senior year of college, I was constantly doing something, constantly trying to accomplish things, giving my all and dedication to school and the daily "doings" of mundane life. I kept my self busy and thought others should do the same too.
I expected 110% from myself in ALL that I did, and I even expected it from others as well. And if people didn't step up and give there best work I would just do it myself (which happened more often than it really should have). I gave my best work at all times to my schoolwork, extracurricular activities, social obligations, and family. I was juggling so many projects, and activities and I felt like I couldn't give anything up. But I did everything to the best of my ability and wanted perfection. I was a perfectionist and everything had to be my best work. I was overloaded with too much to do. And eventually would just do things just to do them. I stopped enjoying my life, my friends, and lived my life on a day-to-day basis attempting to get everything done. I was busy doing, but not really accomplishing much.
I was on the verge of being burnt out. But I pushed myself anyways. Then my dad unexpectedly passed away. It was a BIG wake up call that shook me to my core. My dad's death was and is probably the hardest things that I'm currently going through. At the time I also had to graduate college, literally weeks before the deadline of my senior line, I had to finish my dress a mere two days after my dad passed. I did it for my dad, If I didn't have that reason I would have given up.
I was burnt out and devastated.
And that just doesn't work out, and since then I was panicking, I didn't know what I wanted anymore and I didn't know who I was. I had to stop, re-evaluate and figure out what was really important.
I've been getting a lot better now. Its been about 2 1/2 months since everything has happened. And I'm recovering and getting stronger each day. I had to realize a lot of things, and I've come to accept things for what they are. Here are some important tips to help you get through whatever it is you are going through:
- Take a break. Realize that things will be okay without you. Step away from technology, or from the things that are holding you back.
- Shut out all the external pressures: parents, societal norms, chatter of your peers. And figure out who you are and what truly makes you happy. Write them down, and be candid with yourself.
- Accept that its okay to not know what your doing. Your young, beautiful and amazing. Just go with the flow of life to really figure out what you want to do.
- Do the things that you love. If your like me, I have moved so far away from the things I loved that I really had to research what I wanted to do with myself. Things like blogging, volunteering, or creating jewelry. I really miss it. And I'm beginning to go back to the things I love.
- Most importantly, believe that everything will work out, even if they feel like they aren't going your way. Keep going, keep trying because in the end you'll realize that it all happens for a reason. And that it was meant to benefit your personal growth and well being.
Whether your feeling a little lost, or are having a quarter life crisis too. Just remember that things change and they will get better. It takes time to figure out who you are and it'll be a lifelong journey. Until next Monday, have a peaceful and fulfilling week!
oh wow, i wish that since you're experience quarter life crisis so early, you can elude it when you turn my age...i'm 27 and i've never been this confused about my life.hihi.
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Oh, Ms. Kelly! This post really puts is all out there. My condolences on your loss, but congratulations on the move forward.
"It's not the load that breaks you down. It's the way you carry it" Lena Horne
awww, i really needed to see that quote! i will keep that in mind. :D
<3, Mimi
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Kelly, this is such a touching post.
It's horrific and devastating that you have lost such a significant member of your family, and I wish you the best in these difficult times. I admire that you have taken the initiative to look beyond, instead of consume, your sorrows. This is a very invigorating post. I agree with you that often times, people get consumed with themselves and dedicate 110% to everything. I am one of those perfectionists who demand 110%. If only I had read this last year, when I completely burnt out, and away with my grades I tumbled.
Congratulations first on your new blog. By changing the way you approach us with content, I feel that I have a more personal connection with you, and I hope that we can have a sustainable friendship.
Best of luck,
F ASHIONCONT A GIOUS